How to "Bum out" a bum

As I waited in line for a movie, there was a couple with a stroller and a third, male adult standing at an ATM.

I had quit smoking, but damn I needed one.  So just as the third party with the family lit a cigarette, I took a deep breath and walked toward him to ask politely if I may break my "no smoking" policy and have one of his cigs.  As he pulled out his pack of Broncos, and reluctantly said, "I guess..." when I asked him if I may have one...it occured to me: "He isn't with that family, he is a homie getting ready to hit them up for cash once they are done at the ATM!"

Smart homie as he may be, he had me fooled into believing he was with the family.  I got a free smoke, and because I distracted him- he was unable to beg them for money.

This has been your first lesson on "Bumming out a Bum"

Lost my Keys?!

This morning started like any morning...I woke up, looked around, closed my eyes and willed the time to change back 5 hours so that I could stay snuggle wrapped in our blessing of a bed.  I reluctantly got up, Carpe Diem!  After really dolling it up this morning, and taking every minute I needed to get ready, I found myself scouring the house for my keys frantic and running out of time.  I always put them in my purse or on the counter in the kictchen right as I walk in but I couldn't find them.

Looks like I'm taking the train...I look at my watch...

DAMN!  The train just left.  I call a cab to take me to the transfer station where I can catch the next train and hopefully make it to work in time.

I was surprised to be picked up by a long haired hippy.  He had a lot of questions about my scooter. (you know the one without the keys?)  I started to get a little uneasy since he was asking so many questions and now he knows where I live...  He began to tell me that he only drives the cab two weeks a month until his school money comes in, and then he doesn't work.  Also, he lives off of $1300 a month.  He goes on to explain why that is good since our dollar isn't worth anything anymore and he can live off of very little.  "The EU doesn't want our money, no one will accept our money for oil, we are going to implode."  Have I mentioned, I HATE TALKING ABOUT THIS KIND OF THING?!  I have gone over it and over it in my head.  If it happens, I will still have a purpose, even if it is altered...but I am late for work, can we talk about something else?!

The cab comes to a stop, I get my change.  I wish him "Good luck after the collapse" and he reassures me he will be fine since he can live on so little.  ...yeah, me too...

As I walk over to the ticket machine to get fare for the train, I think to myself, "He must think I'm a total jerk for taking a cab to catch the train...which is cheaper."  Once I finish the thought, it dawned on me that he'd be understand since he, too, is an economical genius.

I haven't ridden the RTD in a while, and I noticed a musty smell that I did not remember.  Mouth breathing it is...  I applied mascara and eyeliner before I got to work, without the wind smearing black streaks across my face which tends to happen on my scootie.

As I listened to Pele on the iPod and reflected, it dawned on me!  I left my scooter keys in the bathroom in the garage!!!  Oh relief!  You sweet sensation... 

A recap of when I lost track of the keys:
I ran into the garage restroom after moving my scooter inside last night, I looked around, but NO bath tissue so I turned (leaving my keys on the sink) and ran upstairs.  Who puts a bathroom in a garage anyway?  Of course it wouldn't have tissue, no one uses it!

I can hardly wait to get home and find my keys waiting for me :)

Woman on Top

PERVERTS!

I am talking about my career!  For any of you who have known me for any length of time, you know that I have ridden the proverbial rollercoaster with my current (and previous) position. 



Eat... My... Shorts.

 I have always been in sales, and with that comes a natural attitude and occasional problem with authority.  I have been fired a few times.  Layed off (not in a good way), and I have had "mutual" splits.  In my egotistical mind, "mutual" is me saying to hell with it when my employer hinted that I better get serious or get serious elsewhere.

This month has been a fabulous month for me professionally.  I have said thanks for my job at least 20 times this month, just because I wanted to burn the place down in the past and leave in a ball of fury.  Then of course, it would have been like a couple of other positions and I would never have admitted it- but held a grudge from afar just so I wouldn't have to take responsibility for my actions.  Instead, I talked myself into "sticking it out" and it has come to this....my life might be changing.  I have made multiple power moves in the last six months that have finally materialized into corporate relationships.  I landed the largest homecare company on a HUGE contract, for which a portion has already been paid.  Here is what I plan to do with my first commission check of substance:

• Scooter Service
• New Side Mirror/Blinker for my Scootie
• Visit to the eye doctor and new glasses (mine are five years old and have been sat upon at least 5 times)
• I'm am getting a bank account!  PLUS SAVINGS!!  I know...I'm impressive
• Replacement cell phone (if I am going to keep paying for the iphone plan I want the phone)
• I have two gifts that I need to get for my someone special but he is a regular reader...sorry beeb
• Then...if there is anything left over- I might just get a Pillow Top (I even have a BB&B coupon!)

So...about the whole "woman on top" thing...I am used to losing (sales term for not making as much revenue) to the men that I work with.  This has been classic across the board.  I was a heavy hitter, contender when I was working in Insurance, but I worked for the love of my life and would do anything he asked.  I worked to make him proud...

Now, I am not only beating my fellow Representatives, but I am beating the director of national accounts, whose title I have chosen not to capitalize because I am a lousy stinking winner :)

I better revel in it now, because if he catches back up next month then who will have egg on her face?!

Please leave comments with all of your congratulations...HA!



Matt & Kim

"and in the daylight we can hitchhike to maine
i hope that someday i’ll see without these frames
and in the daylight i don’t pick up my phone
cause in the daylight anywhere feels like home"



I have never been to a show with the kind of energy that Matt & Kim bring to the table.  I have read a lot of reviews on their act, and conclude that haters will always be just that....HATERS!  Kim has a smile plastered on her face through the whole show.  Only two minutes in, and I was asking my guy if he too thought she was a Cheerleader in a former life.   Matt is equally enthusiastic, but there is something about Kim that just gets ya.  I have never seen two people make that much noise, throwing balloons for everyone to fill and bounce around, making the men take off their shirts and helicopter them over everyones' heads...what a SHOW!  Kim spent just as much time standing on her Bass as she did beating it up.  They rallied their fans throughout the entire show, and kept the energy max'd out.

I wore heels (of course) so my legs were screaming by the end of the show, but I could not help but smile through my exhaustion at the pure excitement of the concert.  It is even more special since they love Denver so much...Kanooty told us we'd love it, and we are still talking about it.  GO SEE MATT & KIM!



I did it! I turned 26!!

It has been far too long since I've updated, so the details will likely be scattered!

Knooty took HE and I out for HIS birthday.  We stayed out all night long laughing, drinking and looking at the beautiful Denver skyline from Knooty's apartment at Brooks.  HIS 34th birthday was a blessing, and to have the people we love around us only enhanced the birthday experience.  May I just say, I LOVE DENVER?!

For my birthday (3 days later) we stopped into the Meadowlark where HE was met by an array of talented artists painting live for a recurring Sunday event.  I could not keep him in my company- he was way too excited to paint!  He painted a beautiful peacock that I have put on the wall in our bedroom.

The next week, we took the kiddos to the Zoo with Lynsey and Josh- what a fun day!  We showed up bright and early on a Saturday to beat the crowds. The animals were all in rare form.  The gazelle was standing on his hind legs, the bears were fighting, and swimming and roaring and it was quite the spectacle!  HE joked that the animals must have had a meeting that morning, where the zoo keepers told them that admissions were down and they really needed to perform or be out of a job.  So funny!  We went to a crawfish boil later that night...kind of ironic now that I think of it.

Last Friday we went to RadRocks for a 180 Ministries benefit featuring DJ Vajra and Brian Head Welch formerly of Korn.  His testimony was amazing.  He has been through a lot of things that dwarf my "wild days" and make me feel like a saint.  I am so proud to belong to a loving, forgiving God.  He certainly can redeem anyone!

Last night, as usual was supposed to be an early night.  Met with E to have a cocktail for her birthday and it turned into an all nighter with the wonderful Jed Kopp, Rev Jim Norris and the girls at Three Kings.  I woke up wondering to myself, "How am I going to make it through the Matt & Kim concert tonight?"

....I'll let you know ;)

Schatzi

Needle in a Haystack

I have recently volunteered to help my family find a new nanny, so far we've been unsuccessful, here is my new post:

My family is looking for a very special individual. We have had many inquiries. Most individuals who have chosen not to pursue the opportunity realize that it is much to far from the city, and are looking for a different kind of position.

We are seeking a person who loves children who can help watch over my six year old brother.

My step-father is in a public elected position and must travel often to see constituents (very boring for a six year old) and my mother works days for the state, but that changes in the winter due to weather. They have a large home in a small town, located just three miles from a cattle ranch that they also run. It is on a river, located less than an hour from Winter Park, Sol Vista, and for an additional hour of driving you can find yourself in Steamboat Springs or Summit County. The town is small, there is no "scene", you won't find an abundance of Democrats, birkenstocks, bars, vegetarians, or "spiritual" people. They are a Christian, Republican, gun-owning, cattle ranching family seeking someone who wants to integrate into their family.

They are not seeking a maid, but rather an active participant to help with my brother and clean up after themselves. There are two rooms that you can choose from depending on whether you prefer a second floor or basement apartment. You will have your own bathroom and access to an office where there is high speed internet. Also, you will be welcome to use the rest of the house as if it were your own. That being said, we expect that this individual has pride of ownership, and keeps their space clean and respectable. My family needs help, they do not need someone to clean up after.

As Christians, we live by the motto "Let your yes be yes, and your no be no", we expect disclosure, honesty, and integrity. You will receive these things in reciprocated kind from us. I live in the city, and cannot move due to my career, but can say that the opportunity is unlike any that you will find, with potential for a long-term home. My family is extremely loving, and they have a close group of friends. There is even a little girl next door who might need occasional sitting, which would provide additional income if you are interested in taking on extra tasks. There might even be opportunity to help on the Ranch, but this is not a ranch hand position.

This is not a position where we are seeking a house manager. We do not need an educator, a chef, a handyman (though any skills you possess that would be of benefit would be very helpful), or any young girls that are escaping bad situations or leaving home for the first time. We are seeking an individual who knows who they are, knows what they want and enjoys the outdoors and has a passion for children. You will not become rich from this position, as we are not rich. We can afford to house and feed an active family participant, and afford a stipend for your work in addition to working with part-time schedules (should you want to find a local job for other stimulation) and as mentioned previously- opportunity to help with Ranch tasks, or babysitting the neighbor girl. First priority, however, should be my brother.

Maybe this is impossible, and there isn't anyone out there that would be a good fit- but faith tells me that just isn't the case. We have come close a couple of times, but just haven't found the right one yet. If you are on the fence, or looking for a too-good-to-be-true situation, this is not for you. We cannot sell this position, we can only tell you what we have to offer. I hope the tone of this ad does not distract from the actual need that my family has. There has been a trail of girls using my family to re-locate and dumping them with airline bills, leaving them without someone to help with my sweet little brother who asks "Why did she leave? What's wrong with me?" Truth be told, he could use some consistency, and we are not looking to save anyone, but rather meet someone who might be in need of a place to call home, who loves children, and respects life.

Neat things about my family: My mother makes wine and soda. She loves to renovate, redecorate and upgrade the house. She is very skilled when it comes to upholstering and re-finishing furniture, she has even made a handful of pieces of furniture in the house. My Step-dad is very funny, and a real old-school cowboy. They all love horses, and can teach you to fish and take you on cattle drives (2x a year). One of the nannies was even purchased a season pass to Winter Park to ski with my little brother.

Neat things about the area: There are multiple rivers, ski resorts, hiking/biking/snowmobiling trails, fishing areas, rafting outfits, rodeos, natural hot springs right in town, tubing areas, frisbee golf course, and even a resort with a swimming pool only a 30 minute drive from the house.

About you: You are coming alone, we cannot house any additional children, or spouses, grandchildren or large animals. If you have one dog or cat that is open to discussion. You'd likely want meet their two dogs and two cats to see about compatibility. You are not seeking full time employment elsewhere and a landing space. You are not escaping anything. You are not looking for someone to pay off a current lease. Quite frankly: you are not looking to gain something for nothing.

Please send an email if you would like to discuss this further. I have tried negotiating wages before on my mother's behalf, and have found it to be less problematic if I write the ad, and do the preliminary sifting. I will forward your information to her, so that you may talk directly about the stipend.

Thank you for your time, and we look forward to hearing from you.

I have yet to hear from anyone...

Almost over Halfway to Fifty

Birthdays always get people thinking.  We get excited about the cake and presents when we are young, drivers licenses at 16, emancipation at 18, the big 21 to start torturing our liver, and then...things start to change.  I remember with each birthday I felt a sense of further accomplishment, like I was becoming more credible with each year that passed.  23 sounds better than 22, and so on. 

The reason I'm writing this is because I had my first "Oh my gosh, I'm about to have a birthday," feeling this morning as I drove to my office.

(Side note: My mood is always affected by bad weather, and when there is little sun, I become a bit of an Eeyore)

My thought, as I charged through the rain on my scooter this morning was, "Why am I about to turn 26, and I have so little to show for my eight years of adulthood?!"  I am riding this scooter, that honestly is about to fall apart.  I'm waiting for one screw to fall out and the whole kit to crumble beneath me.  Thank God I'll only be going 23 MPH when it happens.  Almost getting hit for the umpteenth time, and being yelled at to get my "ugly ass out of the way" by a very beautiful woman hurts.  It's hard to ride the scooter, but every single time it rains I have to worry about how I am going to get home, or get to work safely.  When it is cold I dread the 35 minute commute to the point where I consider calling into work and using some paid time off, to just sit at the house and wait for the rain to clear.

I really want something to make me feel special.  Like maybe my ugly ass isn't in the way, or even just make my ugly ass feel a little prettier.

Maybe once in my life get my makeup done at a department store and get colors that match.

Get my hair done.
I'd like to get some new clothes.
I would like to go on a real vacation, no business, no one else's agenda.
A pedicure perhaps?  Manicure?
Some sort of nice treatment...to feel like a girl.  I feel like a scooter riding, ragamuffin.  There is nothing to get dressed up for.  No where to go. 

I have my faith.  I have love.  I have a job.  I have friends. This is about the girlier things in life that I miss :( 

I just want to feel special and have the money (from my job) to afford something pretty or fancy every once in a while. 

While I used to really like birthdays, my 26th is coming at me bittersweet.  I know that it means nothing to people around me, because let's face it, we all have birthdays.  Nothing special about me, who also has one.  But I have lost more than I have gained in the last few years, and would like to feel like that pretty 22 year old who spent the time and had the money to get the occassional pampering.  I'm sick of feeling like a boy, I vaguely remember what it felt like to be treated delicately.  I guess 26 is a more serious age, and I've had enough years to mess things up.  Maybe this will be my year...but....

Today- I am kind of puny.  I guess I'll watch the rain fall and wish that I could afford some glamour in my life.

Homely yours,
Schatzi

It's the end of the world as "they" know it...

I've read, heard, and thought about a lot concerning the May 21st fiasco, and I think I'm finally ready to write from my headspace what I THINK about it all.

A few things struck me as concerning while talking about the potential apocalypse, and what would happen afterward.  If you (the reader) do not already know this, you will forever more know that I am a Christian.  A follower of Christ.  I chose this only after denouncing my faith as an adult (seventeen year old know-it-all) and trying to create happiness through everything else on earth.  Money, drugs, "love", alcohol, sleep, food, etc.  Once invited back to church it was a game-changer for me.  I needed direction, and it had been there all along.  A place of peace, and a message of hope and love that I can carry with me everyday that will not change during times of distress, familial turmoil, dating woes, money complications, or any other horror story we live through day to day.

For those of you who do not believe, I do not blame you- because at one point in my life, I also did not "buy it".  I've heard the questions "Why do bad things happen to good people?"  "Why would a loving God not take everyone?" "What about the people who die before the rapture, will they never have a chance?"  I cannot answer these questions, as I am under qualified.  He has shown me loving-kindness and I see him do the same for people around me daily who are incapable of counting a single blessing.

Now that I have that out of the way, it's time for me to tell the world just how I feel about being scoffed at as either one of the "idiots", "good kids", "saved ones", and all of the other names I have heard of referring to the believers that would in fact ascend should the apocalypse happen.

Fact one: (for non-believers this might come as a surprise) Christians are not brilliant.  They are not perfect.  They are not even all that good.  They just believe in something that is bigger than they are (Jesus) who served more people than I could ever hope to serve.  I'm still not all that good most of the time, but I know where I get my strength to try to be better...

Back to "Christians not being brilliant"- it is important to know that the man (Christian) who predicted the rapture was in fact, an idiot.  If he knew his text, he would realize that the rapture has been promised to happen like "A thief in the night".  In other words, God has promised that no one will know when it is going to happen.  After all of the publicity that guy created, don't you think it would be dumb of Good Ole' God to throw in the towel on all of the other promises he has made, and just let 1/6 of the world population know about it?  Unfortunate example of another one of us boneheads trying to tell other people what to do instead of just showing faith.  I am not putting my retirement into billboards, I'll tell you that much.  I don't even want to scare you into salvation.  Perhaps, if I'm lucky, I will make a positive impact in the lives of many regardless of their religious preference.

For those people who boasted "End of the World Parties" (to which I was invited to ZERO) I hope your hangover was bad on Sunday...not nice?  That is the human in me, not the Christian.
Newsflash: People have been predicting the end of the world- since the beginning of the world. (See previous post re: Signs of the Times)  It is in our nature, and not at all surprising that we spend so much of our time trying to predict something that is completely unpredictable.  Now, we still have to get through the Mayan calendar disaster, but after this last big let down, I think I'm going to spend less time caring about stock market predictions, the rapture, the economic crumble, massive earthquakes, burning man, and coronary heart disease, and start to worry about the stuff that really matters.  Let the Good Lord take me when he will...it just better not be too soon {{{shakes fist at sky}}}

I truly, would have been miffed had it all ended, because I have so much I still want to do with my life.  Please stop comparing me to you and you to me.  I am just a girl who believes in a good God, and hopes to be better tomorrow than I am today.

HE discovers a way to passenger a skateboard companion

This weekend redefined family outing, bonding, teamwork and tenacity.  My guy discovered that with a very long longboard and his 20+ years of thrash experience that he could, in fact, passenger a smaller companion at the front of his board as he skates.

First he tried it with the older of the two girls, the seven year old- who quite frankly, will try anything with a smile on her face and with no hesitation for posterity.  The younger of the two, however, is prone to digging in her heels whenever asked to do something.  (*NOTE: She will even resist if you are telling her to do something in her own favor, like, "Take this popsicle," or "Here, play with your new toy," she simply will not comply. 

I think after seeing her big sister do something SO cool, she wanted to try...and after a small crash, and a minor scare- This is the end result...

I watch this man skate hard, because he's amazing, and loves to show me how good he is at stuff.  Let's face it...every girl wants to see how impressive her guy is.  Every guy wants his girl to see him at his best.  But now to watch him as Skate-Dad, I have an even higher appreciation for the love I have for hisself.

Oooh la la.

Sunburn Bloody Sunburn...

As a Sweed/Kraut my skin is a nice peachy pink most of the time, unless I have been working diligently on a tan- which I have not.  Having a full appendage tattoo'd really prohibits the amount of sun exposure I am willing to get...I would hate to ruin the color on my bird, with the goal of browning for a season...though....

Saturday was a scorcher.  HE and I slept in, until 9!  Yes, big deal.  A weekend without the kids which was just a last minute arrangement for Mother's day meant that we had all weekend to play, well, like big kids!  We met with Dad in Arvada at arguably the coolest park I've ever been.  We played 18 holes of frisbee golf on the same frisbee course where my dad almost lost his ear.  *In the short time since his attack, he has managed to heal so well that you can hardly see a scar.  If you are going to get stiches- I recommend the ER at Lutheran*  I love to learn new things, but often buckle under pressure.  Playing frisbee golf with two advanced players, and having people both ahead of me to keep up with, and behind me pushing me to go faster really put the pressure on.  Naturally, I choked.  Second hole and my frisbee was down the ditch and sunk to the bottom of the creek bed.  In Arvada the water in the ditch doesn't run clear, I wouldn't drink it and I was hesitant to get in to retreive my poor shot- but alas, I took my shoes off, rolled up my jeans and got to it.  Second shot went straight down the creek about 50 feet and sank to the bottom yet again.  I got a 2 over par on that particular hole, and bombed it straight into the creek on hole three before asking my dad for a little assist.  He was able to give me some pointers that helped me maintain an even 1over par on each hole.  By the 17th (one of the holes has been taken off of the course due to innocent by-standing cars) Dad was 4 over, HE was 5 over and I....was at a solid 19.  Ugh.  Frisbee gets me again.  Thanks to Dad, I improved after the first five holes, but the damage was done at that point....oh and the meltdown on hole 17 was measurable.

Afterward we enjoyed lunch at Little Anitas before heading back to the house for a three hour skate session.  What a joy to do something that I'm increasingly good at!  I mean, I'm pushing all over the city, and only improving on my carving.  Dad got a call, and was notified it was time to get back to work.  After three weeks of time spent- it was time to get back on the road, but this time together will leave a mark in my heart for the rest of my life.  It is never too late to spend quality time with Dad.  I'm so happy about that time spent, I reflect regularly on it.

After Dad said goodbye to HE and I, I had a few minutes to clean up and get ready to go watch our friend race out in Erie.  He has been training for about three months for the novice motorcycle flat track races.  Ben and the amazing Deb own a clothing and screen print operation here in Denver and have been dear friends with my guy for years.  I'm fortunate to call them pals myself.  Though, one unfortunate evening, after drinking too much- I threw up in his Screen Print dryer...not one of my prouder moments- but it was years ago and I'm hoping they thought it was someone else... or perhaps they forgot after Kitty escorted me curbside to deal with my fate.  *Loser*  Anyhooo- Ben won both of his races, which made our entire day complete.  Frisbee golf, mexican food for lunch, skateboarding, motorcycle race and of course...the SUNBURN.

Now, my shoulder feels like a saddle and I'm fairly certain I did permanent damage due to the almost immediate brown freckles that appeared on my right shoulder.  Don't judge.

Talkin bout my best friend!

Bear with me, this one is going to start slow...

Yesterday morning, I was so happy to be home, and even happier to come home to scooter weather!  I think I had an open mouthed grin on my way to work, until I hit York- that is...

My scooter is a 49cc Kymco, with one mirror, a broken tail light, and a nice tag on the side of the tank from a kind neighbor of mine in the Five Points area.  It was stolen a year ago and painted with flat red spray paint, the drips cover most of the body.  It's a beaut.  I'm not sure if you know this, but 49cc is not a lot.  Also, a V8 engine is much bigger- there is your auto lesson for today. 

As I turned from Colfax onto York to start my southward trek, an impatient commuter in a beautiful Jeep Grand Cherokee (the V8) started to rev up on the tail of my scooter.  The speed limit is 30MPH and since it was a hill and I had just been stopped at a red light, I was trying to gain speed to hit the limit.  He impatiently sped around me after honking and almost hitting the back of my scooter.  He cut so close as he pulled in front of me, I had to hit my breaks.  He sped around the next two corners only to be caught at the next red light, where I pulled up behind him.  I honked my horn and he opened his door and I asked, "What is your problem?!"  He said, "If you can't keep up with traffic get off the road you fucking dipshit, people have places to be!"  He endangered my life, which made me so angry- but shortly after his hateful words, tears started rolling down my cheeks and blurring my vision.  How could someone be so mean?  Don't you think I'd rather be driving a beautiful new Jeep?  Nah...I prefer my tagged up, spray paint dripping, lawnmower engine, mirror missing, stolen and recovered scooter that goes 32MPH tops.

As I cried all the way to work, I reflected on the difficult transitions I have gone through over the last three years.  I'm so glad that my ex is out of my life, because of the pain he caused- but I had nice things too before that all went downhill.  I had a job where I made great money, pets, furniture, designer clothes, and a beautiful car. 

Maybe if roads should be labeled by social status, I wouldn't have inconvenienced the important man who needed to get to the next light before I did.  He could have avoided my loser 30 MPH commute if he had taken the highway where lowlings like myself cannot imagine driving.

I wonder if he thinks I got up, got dressed, hopped on my scooter in the chilly weather and went slow just to annoy him.  I'm just trying to keep a job.

After crying all day over the injustice, posting on Craigslist and being flagged, and freezing on my way home- I was tapped.  When my guy got home, we commiserated for a while over money, work, my commute, his ever-increasing work responsibilities and I decided...it is time to go for a skate.

We picked up the boards and hit the pavement.  Since there wasn't a baseball game, we were able to skate the parking lot all the way to the hill (which he made me go down twice from heights I had never tried before).  I got the speed wobbles a little bit, which got my heart pumping, but pushing around Denver on a longboard after a horrible day is better therapy than a bottle of Jack.  We skated the sidewalks of Lodo's before arriving at Biker Jim's for a dog and a Strongbow.  We stayed well past dark reading the Onion, laughing and remembering just how good we have it- since we're going on four years and the love only grows the longer we are together.

That only began our night on the streets.  HE showed me how to drag my foot to slow me down, and we bombed the hill by our house about 8 times.  Once back in the house he introduced me to the Arctic Monkeys and we drew up skateboard ideas for an hour or more.  Ideas flying and chemistry permeating the room, I forgot about the woes of the day and realized, yet again...that I am one of the luckiest girls alive.

I live with and love dearly my best friend.  I fell asleep in his arms, right where I belong.

Lords Of D-Town

I am so HAPPY!  Let me start with that.

Last night, when Dad and I got home- we grabbed the boards and went over to Coors Field Parking.  At first, I thought this was going to be a short-lived experience.  Remember how Dad bought that board, the Caddy?  Well, he learned how to ride it yesterday and I must say that is one of the coolest things that has ever happened to me.  Riding skateboards with my dad in Downtown Denver...stohhhhp! 

Gizmeaux was still on his leash, so even more surprisingly my Dad taught himself how to skateboard while holding the dog leash.  The dog wanted to play Frisbee...not with me, with Dad.  Once Dad got off of the board, Gizmeaux laid his head on top of the board and put his feet under it.  What a *hint* eh? 

Once HE got home, we all picked up the boards and went for a cruise to Coors Hill.  HE really is impressive to watch.  His new board came in yesterday so we hit the pavement like a gang of unsuspecting hooligans.  I mean really, who skates around with big dopey smiles on their faces?  Waving at strangers, kissing babies...well...maybe not the baby part.  We cut through a few parking lots and made our way to Biker Jim's for round three.  What a treat.  Strongbow and a Reindeer Dog, shhhhh, I'm eating.

I could have stayed out all night long- well, except it was dark and all.

This morning, I woke up so excited, I leaned over and asked HIM if HE wanted to go for a skate.  He grumbled, "no".

Le Sigh.

I leave tomorrow for Florida and I am quite excited!  My guy bought me the Tina Fey book Bossypants and it's all I can do not to read it all right now.  Oh how I look forward to this trip...

See you next week,
Schatzi

Time with Dad

My Dad has always been one of my heroes.  He is very tall, funny, thoughtful, patient, giving, and hard working.  Growing up, he was a typical work-a-holic, trying to make life better for the ones at home that he loved.  In his field, working at home was simply not an option.  I always loved it when Dad would come home, because I loved his sense of humor, his music, his Pepsi, potato chips, daddy noodles (an affectionate name for Ramen), his movies (Big Trouble in Little China was my favorite), and he'd always play either baseball, football, golf, Frisbee, or any other sport we were interested in at the time.  Things just seemed to slow down when Dad was home, he's always been an easy person to be around.

With tax season, he had to come back to CO to get his filing done.  My dad has been in Denver now for three weeks.  I have been so blessed to be able to spend my mornings with him on the way to work.  He shows up at exactly 7 am every morning.  Just as we are about to get to

Jackson Street

, he asks "Want to get breakfast?"  and I say, "If you do!" and he says, "I could always eat."  We grab New Mexican breakfast at Little Anitas and he drops me off at the office and lets me know if I need a ride home, just to call him.  He knows I won't because I hate to inconvenience him- so he calls me and says, "Want me to come get you?"  I hope he is loving this as much as I am, though he really does have the bad end of the deal.

This board owns.

I love showing him my expanding musical taste.  The cool places around Denver that I think he'd find impressive.  I cooked him a killer steak on a Grill he gifted us, and I was so excited when he ate the Asparagus with it- since he has never liked that particular vegetable.  We've been to Biker Jim's Gourmet Dogs on Larimer (twice)...YUM and we went to My Brother's Bar on Platte after a round of Frisbee Golf.  After MBB he took me to get a new long board, and even bought himself one that is far better than mine and is camping at my house for now...I'm not complaining- this thing is like the Cadillac of long boards.

If he's not working on his computer during the day, he and his K9-Heterosexual-Lifemate-For-Life are out at a new exciting Frisbee golf course.  Now, if you haven't met my dad's dog, you are missing a really interesting relationship.  Gizmeaux (he's Cajun) is one of the most intelligent animals I have ever encountered.  He is a Queensland Blue Healer, and he knows commands such as "right" "left" "further" "Frisbee" "golf" "truck", etc...You get the point.  They were out playing Frisbee golf when one of my fellow Denver citizens (stoned of course) assaulted my dad with a Frisbee.  This is no "catch" Frisbee.  They fly from 60-80MPH and weigh about 8 oz a piece.  These things are deadly...imagine if it had hit him in the neck!  This particular impact was caused by a "driver".



Dad's caption "How cool is this?"



The Frisbee went straight through his ear, and punctured his head behind the ear.  He had 8 cartilage stitches, seven behind the ear, and 3 in his head.  Did I mention that this happened on Easter? "Hi Liz, it's your Dad, I'm in the emergency room, but I'll be alright.  I don't think I'm going to celebrate holidays anymore, since I often end up in the emergency room."  Two years ago, he spent 8 days in the ER over Thanksgiving due to a run-in with a Copperhead snake.

Well, he's about to have work coming up, but I needed to write about this while he is still here to have it in the archives.  HE (another impressive Dad to daughters, and the love of my life) and I talk about the importance of Dads.  I never really understood the weight of that point until just recently.  Having my Dad around gives me so much peace.  He believes in me.  Thinks I'm beautiful.  Is proud of me.  Thinks I'm important enough to pick up and breakfast with every morning that he is here.  I will never forget these three weeks.  Three of the most important weeks of my life simply for the time we have spent together, the laughter, and the inner peace I have found in knowing that no matter how old I get...my Dad loves me.

I'm a very lucky girl.

Time to embrace...

For those of you who knew about me hurting my foot just over a year ago, while prancing around outside (what can I say, I really like spring...) I am sad to inform you that I have re-injured myself.  This club, left foot of mine is giving me a really hard time.  I haven't worn heels in six weeks- I walk like a rah-tard and I'm taking so much ibuprofen I'll be lucky if my liver functions next Spring.  But let me tell you, it has not just been a challenge because of walking...oh no.  HE taught me how to ride a longboard just before the injury...in fact, I think the first fall off the board might be the reason for the re-injury.  Le Sigh. 

So...meanwhile, I've been gaining weight, and I've had it.  My mom started a new diet, and I'm on board.  I want to fit into my cute clothes by my 26th birthday in June, and though some of you might be thinking it is not possible...I assure you it is.  Pray with me that the relief of the extra weight will just magically heal my thumper foot.

I'm going to Florida in two days.  Helen, my dear sweet Helen is picking me up and strangely enough, I'm thanking the stars that she too, has a broken foot.  Watch out Ft. Lauderdale!!!

Mr. Tattoo called and said he will be in town the very days I am in Florida.  I'm not happy about this, but hopefully I will have shrinked my peacock arm before he comes back so that I have less surface area to tattoo.  Ugh. Ugh. ugh.

Some Days Are Better Than Others...

When life starts changing, again, for the thousandth time in a BIG way- things can be very exciting.  The prospect of moving closer to downtown, just me and my guy, rooftop patio, near the ball field and with the reassurance of a two year commitment sounds so nice.

Managing the stress is an altogether different thing.

For three weeks I have been scrambling...selling things, trying to find a lease that will allow two years, without a psycho owner, near downtown, near the light rail, searching for space saving furniture.  Not to mention, I have a full time job, and play a support role to many people who depend on me.  I'm frazzled.

It seems that when I am spread thin, it becomes more and more difficult for me to manage my stress without either taking a day or two to cry my eyes out, or lash out.  Unfortunately, I feel like doing both during the stressful periods that sneak in, in between the excitement of Spring and having a new home.

Last night took the cake.  Twice this week already, I have been unable to just breathe in and breathe out and know that the Good Lord will provide.  Instead, I'm a big mess.  I tossed and turned all night between scary sleep stories that had me rattled.  Usually when I wake up throughout the night, I can't believe how much time has elapsed.  I was waking up every ten minutes and marvelling at how slow the world was spinning.

I got up early, since I barely slept between the worry and cold sweats.  My eyes are swollen and to top it all off, I dropped my iPhone this morning on my sprint to the train. 

April can't come soon enough.

My life as a nomad...

I have moved 16 times in the last eight years.
I have paid off and cancelled any accounts I was responsible for.
I no longer have a car payment.
I no longer have a house payment.
I no longer have insurance payments.
I no longer have pets.

I pay cash.
If I don't have the cash, I do not purchase the product, service, or beverage.
At any time, I can pick up and leave.  Move for a 17th time...

My grown-up life regressed back to a gypsy-standard for the last few years.  The less I was responsible for, or "on the books" for, the more liberated I felt.  A gritty, weathered nomad.  A Minuteman.  Ready at a minute's notice to disappear.  Doesn't that sound lovely? 

Ohp!  "Where'd Liz go?" They'd say... "She left no trace, just woke up one day and never came back.  There is no record of her."  I have no reason to vanish anymore, though.

Turns out...I've ne'er shopped online.  I've never sent flowers.  I cannot book a hotel room.  I cannot rent a car.  If I want to save money, I stash it.  Rarely is there anything to save, but I think that times are changing.  Liz is growing older, again.

I have one bill that I pay every month through Western Union, costing me $15.96 a month, that is a15% service charge.  I do not want a bank account, I feel the same about Banking institutions, as I do about Dentists, Mechanics, and Baristas...they are ALL trying to up sell me.  How have I been combating them?  By avoiding them.

But alas, I want to shop online when I see something I MUST have, plus who doesn't like a package delivered to their doorstep?  Also, what if I want to put a little more thought into a gift for someone I love?  What if I want to send Valentines to the ones I love who are far away?

I got a prepaid debit card.  I know, it sounds like I'm a drug dealer, but it seemed like the least amount of commitment.  It costs me $1.50 a month, I can do direct deposit (a great feature for savings), and I can cancel anytime.

You can't see me!

Perhaps it's an issue with commitment that I struggle with.  I hate feeling stuck, hopefully my new "TrackCard" will give me the financial openness of using VISA without the burden of a long term relationship with an "Institution".  I am anti-institution.  Commitment Cautious.  Convenience Curious.  Off the grid.  Spy. 

The need to live like a nomad is slowly dissolving.  But what's next?

Signs of the Times

I haven't posted since September.  Partially because I have been just dancing, floating through the Holidays with an uncompromised Joy that I haven't felt in what seems like a lifetime.  I'm in love.  I am loved.  I feel closer to my family than I ever have.  I feel closer to my friends than I ever have.  I feel closer to God than I have in a long time, but the most noticeable feeling I have is the acceptance and appreciation I have for myself again.  Which leads me to this: worry.


Let me tell you the things I am worried about first, then I'll elaborate.  Laugh first, then investigate.


1) December 12, 2012 the end of the Mayan Calendar
2) The actual crumble of the U.S. economy
3) The apocalypse


So...I can probably just understand that (3) is inevitable and members of my fellowship of Christians have been saying that the "end is near" for centuries...perhaps I should scratch this one off of my list.


The other two show (blatantly) that I am still working on my perfect faith.  Will it ever be "perfect"?  No, but I have to work on it, and I fail sometimes with worry!


(1)    The end of life as "we know it" as predicted by the Mayans.  Ok, so none of them are around today to ask about this phenomenon.  But after speaking with my dad, (who is a real whiz on most things Mayan) I am semi-convinced that his theory is something to worry about.  Let me explain...or try to.  The Mayan calendar ends on December 21, 2011 because they predict that something so catastrophic will take place that "life as we know it will change."  It was not predicted that this will be the end of the world, just that the world as we now know it will be forever changed.  What could change so drastically that we don't even care about a calendar?  I can tell you this folks, I will be in my 27th year of life, and I am not ready to find out!  I don't want to sound like a total spoiled brat here, but if I only get to live in good old humanity as I know it before I'm fishing through trash cans, and hunting for rodents because something apocalyptic happened, I WILL NOT BE HAPPY.



So aside from the damn Mayans who are really throwing a wrench in my Ten Year Plan- I worry about the ECONOMY.  Dang it!  There's that word again, I already wrote a blog on Economy and Eternity and I'm terrified.  But this time- I'm shaking!  My counterpart, Michael Snowball, reminded me today the difference between probable and possible. Thank God for his logic.  I'm getting ahead of myself....


2)    On November 24th, Russia and China made an agreement to no longer trade in the Dollar.  Follow this article for more info: http://www.chinadaily.com.cn/china/2010-11/24/content_11599087.htm



So...if they don't like our money anymore, who's to say other countries like...for instance...SAUDI ARABIA decide they don't want our "Dinky Dollar" anymore either?  America + Oil = Commerce. Comfort for consumers. Travel. Economy.  If we don't have oil (because we get cut off, and we are in DEBT up to our eyeballs), we don't have food.  No food?  Well, I'm not going to kick and scream here people, but I live in Five Points.  My home is the newest home in the Notorious Neighborhood, and if my neighbors were trying to size up who has abundance, by process of elimination alone...We are a target.  We live in a 4 story, (rental) custom built, townhouse with a downtown view and designer fixtures in the middle of the projects.  I had better be able to defend my home, and turn it into a fortress.  But I can't!  I can't stand guns, I get nervous around them even if they aren't loaded.  I cannot wield a knife, I wouldn't get close enough without being shot first.  I have a really bright flashlight with knifey edges so that I can blind and mame someone.  Will that stop them from taking what I have in my home (in a violent fashion), or worse...hurting my family?  No.


So, I guess I'm just a little worried, because I don't know if I would survive if Marshall Law went into effect.  If something apocalyptic happens, or our economy melts down to "depression" I'm going to be mad that I only made it to 25.  I'm going to heaven, but would I kill to stay on Earth?  My skin crawls at the thought.


Should I even be worried about this?